11 February 2022 at 11:33
First Date Flutters
(and other foreboding phenomena)
Anticipatory anxiety can be debilitating for some, an annoying inconvenience for others, but chances are we’ve all experienced it at some point in our lives. Let's take a look at some of the causes and symptoms, and the well-known homeopathic remedies that can help.
Valentine’s Day is nearly here. Love it or hate it millions will be going out on a first date. This means for some romantic souls it can be a day with a lot of pressure leading up to the big night. Aaaack! Cue the first date flutters (or possibly full body jitters)! Many people experience anticipatory anxiety before big events, performances, exams, work presentations, pay reviews, or situations where vulnerability or discomfort is involved (ahem, dentist appointments). The good news is, you are not alone, and homeopathy can help.
Social phobia is the most common of all phobias, and encompasses many of our anticipatory anxieties. Our flight-fight-freeze system is there to protect us from true threat or danger, and we probably wouldn’t last long without it, but often anticipatory anxiety shots into overdrive over a non-life-threatening event. Public speaking, upcoming tests, and first dates are not inherently harmful situations. We may even willingly sign up for them, but when our body decides to react as if they are harmful, and our flight-fight-freeze system kicks in, we end up in the uncomfortable realm of anticipatory anxiety.
Common symptoms of anticipatory anxiety include: hyperventilating, visual effects, cold or tingly extremities, muscle tension, sweating, and your heart beating faster. All of these physiological reactions have their role to play if you’re about to fight off a raging wooly mammoth. But you might want some help to calm them down if what you’re about to be a Valentine - sipping on a glass of Chardonnay and nibbling on crudités whilst being witty and charming and deciding what to order that won’t give you bad breath.
While we can’t promise to make your first date a success, we can offer some insight into a few homeopathic remedies that might help calm your nerves and let you relax and shine through as your wonderful, second-date-worthy self.
Homeopathic remedies to consider:
Gelsemium – This remedy is great when the upcoming event feels like an impossible ordeal. They may literally have the first date jitters, as trembling is a common symptom here, with or without chills, which may run up and down the spine. There may be an overwhelming fatigue or buckling at the knees. Not being able to get words out, as well as diarrhea, loss of appetite and a general heavy feeling may accompany a Gelsemium anxiety state. In general, they just feel unable to cope with the situation at hand!
Argentum Nitricum – Public speaking, exams, and claustrophobia are all Arg Nit fears. If this is the needed remedy, they may feel hurried and like time is passing too slowly leading up to the big event. They may also feel over-hot, or have diarrhea. Arg Nit people have a fear of being late for their important events and therefore may experience anxiety from the moment a time is set. Interestingly, although public speaking is one of their number one anxiety-inducing ordeals, they are generally outgoing and personable and like to be in public if they’re not the ones in the spotlight.
Silicea – Silicea people will likely respond to anticipation by feeling shy, timid, or even bashful. They have a fear of failure, and a fear that they won’t come across the way they want to come across. They may compensate for their nerves by dwelling on small details, and may even consider giving up or cancelling the big plans.
Lycopodium – The Lycopodium anxiety is usually related to stage fright of some sort (and rarely is there a more frightening one-on-one stage than a first date). Lycopodium may be confident, even arrogant at home, but that all washes away when they have to ‘appear’. They may try to cover this up by acting boastful or egotistical – it’s like they’re trying to prove just how not scared they are by over-compensating. This hot wind coming out of their mouths may be matched by hot wind coming out of their bottoms, and bloating to go with it in a stressed state.
Aconite – This remedy may be the one if the anxiety comes on suddenly and is quite overwhelming. An Aconite case of anticipatory anxiety might feel closer to a panic attack than some of the others. Heart pounding, almost frantic restlessness with an inability to be still, wanting company, increased thirst, and a fear of dying may all be a part of this anxiety picture. They may try to compensate if they know the anxiety is coming by trying to plan things in advance, and know everything there is to know about the situation in order to mitigate their coming stress.
Mezereum – This is a lesser-known anxiety remedy, and its main distinguishing feature is that the anxiety is felt primarily in the epigastrium. It is described as an anguished, empty feeling in the stomach as if they are dying. The people in need of this remedy may get cold to the bone or a frozen feeling also.